Success Tastes Sweet, Like a Red Pepper

I made it to the end of my program at Nutritional Healing on Friday morning.

Wednesday night was my last night on shift. It was a busy night, and I didn't sleep all that long during the day, so it was a little rough. It was the last one though, and the business at least kept time rolling for the most part. It's a lot easier to deal with slight sleep deprivation when there's plenty to occupy your mind.

I had my dinner.

Salmon, rice, broccoli. Pretty standard.

I did some work.

I had a snack.

I have to eat red peppers every day. 

I'm vaguely obsessed.

Did some more work.

And since Thursday was my transition day, instead of coming home and going to bed I made myself some breakfast and prepared to go to the gym.

Eggs, spinach, mushrooms, and chevre for pretention.

The workout was rope climbs, these weird jump lunge thingys, and jerks. I went light because no sleep + overhead movements = badness. I made it to the beam on every rope climb, and felt good about most of them. I can get the ceiling in 3 pulls 95% of the time. I think if I could convince myself to jump up on the rope I might be able to do it in 2. Maybe someday. The jump lunges were supposed to be with a 15# dumbbell in each hand. I used 10s, because tired. Holy BALLS did those things suck. They were exhausting and somewhat difficult to execute and Friday morning? My legs were totally fucked. 

After the WOD I realized that I'd managed to rope burn my shins. Again.

I do CrossFit because it makes my legs look

so fuckin' sexy. 

There was an exciting development in home fitness this past week. I said "fuck it" and ordered a flat bench, a squat rack, and some flooring for our basement in order to make myself a home gym. I've been telling fantastic husband that I wanted to clean up the unfinished part of the basement and make it a gym. He's been insisting that we need to finish that part of the basement...for *ahem* a while with no progress. So I cleared the area, ordered my shit, and told him after the fact. Easier to ask for forgiveness than permission amirite?

So I built the stuff and he helped me secure the pull-up bar across the top. Voila. Home gym.

FUCK YEAH, SQUAT RACK!

And mismatched flooring, but whatevs.

I took a short nap, which was probably a bad idea, because I felt like a zombie when I woke up. I couldn't even tell you what I did in the afternoon or what I had for dinner. Something? I think? But fantastic husband made yonanas, so I had some of that. I haven't eaten bananas in 12 weeks (they're not on the approved foods list for NH because of the high sugar content-serving size is like 1/3 of a banana), and I didn't really miss them. I'm kind of over bananas, but this was good. Tossed on a few cocoa nibs for crunch and chocolatey flavor.

Just a little bit.

The kids wanted to go for a walk after supper and I was all "HAHAHAHAHA no". But my wonderful husband took them out, and by the time they came back I was in bed. Where I slept like a corpse for about 13 hours.

Before my BIA I can't workout for 12 hours, eat for 4 hours, or have caffeine or alcohol. Most of that isn't a big deal. My main challenge is hydration. I've been drinking water like whoa for the last 3 weeks, but I was concerned that not drinking for 13 hours before the test would be problematic. I did NOT want my final result to be skewed. So I pounded water all day while I was awake and 2 liters right before bed. 

I woke up at 2am to pee (surprise!) and pounded another 40 ounces while I was in the bathroom before going back to bed. I had asked fantastic husband earlier to remind me to drink water whenever he saw me without my water bottle. I came back to bed, he rolled over and mumbled "Did you remember to drink water?"

Is he a great husband or what?

So I woke up, got dressed in exactly the same clothes I wore to my first appointment (I want my datapoints legit, bitches), pounded 2 liters of water and headed out.

And my final results were...fucking incredible.

While I was having my weight and measurements done, Kirk the Nutrition Guy and I were chatting and he mentioned that we would be reviewing my labs. I said something like "Oh, I'm looking forward to that, I love numbers" and he got all "Spoiler alert-they're awesome" which made me smile. 

My final weight was 157# on the nose. 8.2 total pounds down. Whatever. Weight loss wasn't the goal. He measured my waist at 28.75". UNDER 29 INCHES?!?!?! What the actual fuck? I have been fighting for years to get my waist below 30, and I have once or twice, but it never stays below 30. And now it's UNDER 29?!?!

I did a little dance.

This means I lost 2.25" off my waist over the course of the program.

Next we measured my hips. 39.5". UNDER 40"!!!!! For a total loss of 1.5" off the hip. I may have danced again. Maybe.

Then I had the electrode dealiebob and Kirk recorded my numbers and put them in the whiz-bang machine.

Over the last 12 weeks I shed 5.6% body fat. I hit 21% on the dot, which was my goal. 21% body fat. Holy shit. I cannot believe I lost 5.6% body fat in TWELVE WEEKS. That is RIDICULOUS. In other numbers, I lost 11lbs of fat. Remember how I said I was down 8.2lbs? Yeah. It was ALL FAT. The difference is extra muscle and better hydration. You will never see shit like that on Jenny Craig, yo.

That number was pretty fucking exciting, but even moreso for me was my percentage of body muscle. When I started I was at 19% which is pretty damn good for an old gal like me. Yesterday? 20.3% I made it OVER 20% muscle mass!!! That's the target for dudes. 

Now I wonder if I can make those numbers intersect. Because apparently I am never satisfied with anything ever.

Perhaps even better than all this shit is my labs. They were basically fine when I started with a slight irregularity in my thyroid and insulin numbers, and a very low Vitamin D. At the end? All my numbers were fucking perfect and my vitamin D went from "Do you even go outside, bro?" to "Hey, you're scraping the bottom of the normal range!". That was pretty cool to see. I'm so shit with compliance on vitamins and stuff, so even with my spotty consumption of my vitamin D supplement I was able to make a substantial difference.

As an aside, fantastic husband has informed me that he'll "give me the D" whenever I want. How kind.

So what does all this look like? I don't have a "before" picture really, since I didn't really feel like a "before" when I started. Here is the after as of this morning.

I swear there are abs there. 

There are. 

Not exactly competition ready, 

but not too shabby.

There you have it. My final results. This whole thing has been amazing. Eye opening. All this? During this entire process I took only fish oil and vitamin D as supplements. I think I had like 2 protein shakes the whole time. This was all food. My activity level was precisely the same as it was before I started. I will repeat: THIS WAS ALL FOOD. No shakes. No pills. No powders. No special drinks. JUST FOOD. Two thousand four hundred calories of food. Errrryday. 

It was so hard at the beginning. It seemed impossible. But it is clearly not. I ate out. I had the occasional alcoholic beverage. I had a few pieces of Easter candy. I wasn't perfect, but I stuck as closely as possible to my checkboxes and I never wrote off a day. If I went out, I made the best possible choices. If I drank, I kept it moderate. If I caved and had some chocolate I didn't let myself slide into a sneaky hate spiral-and I never cheated myself out of the food I needed because I slipped. I learned that my body needs food. Good food, wisely chosen and mindfully eaten. 

There is no miracle, no gimmick, no fad. The results I got were from excessive, relentless self care. I have no intention of stopping. Why would I? I feel great, my clothes fit, and I've been making gains like fucking crazy in the gym. 

I would like to sincerely thank the staff at Nutritional Healing, in particular Kirk who was my nutritionist for the last 12 weeks. Everyone was so nice, and I looked forward to my visits every 2 weeks.  I'll be back in 12 weeks to check my continued progress and keep myself honest. 

Here's a picture of my brunch after my 15 hour fast. It was delicious, it was almost filling (seriously, what a difference from 12 weeks ago), and it was all on plan. I considered "rewarding" myself with something shitty after my appointment. But you know what? That's stupid. So instead I had this.

And it was awesome.

Friday night I celebrated with a concert. Mumford&Sons. It was a great show. I even had 2 beers beforehand, because beer is delicious.

The encore.

And now if you'll excuse me, I need to make a huge breakfast so I can be fueled up enough to perform 3 of my least favorite CF movements in about an hour.

Fucking thrusters. 

Day 16 of 23: I Need to Stop.

Buying pants. I need to stop buying pants.

BUT LOOK HOW CUTE THEY ARE!

I justify this by buying only stuff on clearance. I've only purchased one regular price fitness item in this whole endeavor. But clearance stuff adds up, too. Since I pretty much only wear gym clothes this is totally legit though, right?

Don't worry, I haven't spent myself into a hole or turned to a life of crime or anything, but I'm definitely a little out of control. With this delivery I've officially replaced every pair of pants I gave away. I have 6 pairs of perfectly acceptable shorts, and I definitely don't need anymore tanks or shirts for working out.

I'm just giving myself plenty of incentive to stay on the wagon. All part of the grand plan.  No it's not. I just love the shit out of this stripey fabric and I must have it in all the colors OH MAH GAH. 

Yesterday I took a rest day. This is how a rest day looks for me. Sitting in a chair, feet up with my sheepy shirt on. Yarn to my left, laptop open to my knitting website. I drank coffee and worked on my Zodiac blanket. Pretty much all day. I did take the dog for a walk, but that was it.

Resting makes me antsy. If I didn't knit I'd go nuts.

Now, I love doing nothing. I really do, and rest is vitally important to any fitness program. But I haven't taken many full-on rest days lately and it was harder than expected. What saved me was the Hero WOD programmed at the box. "Adrian". I'm not a fan of that workout...because I can't do somersaults. For real. No matter how I'm instructed, I always end up landing on my neck and my head, neck, and shoulders hurt for days afterwards (and I mean they hurt not they're sore). So I skipped it. Thanks for the rest day, Coach. 

Since I was resting, I had a carb heavy breakfast. That sounds stupid, but I can't eat oatmeal before a hard workout. I burn through it too quickly and brown out. It's delicious, and I love it, but it's shitty workout fuel for my hyperactive pancreas. 

With blueberries and some nuts 'n seeds.

The rest of the day I spent picking at snacks and dicking around. Laundry folding, trying to nap (unsuccessfully), doing dishes, knitting, and finally heading off to work. When I got there I was handed a surprise in the form of "Hi! Signing off now!" at 10pm from our northern partner. Uh, okay, I guess I'm on double hospital duty my whole shift now. 

It's cool.

Last night was a weird one. It wasn't busy exactly, but we had a few oddball things pop in and out overnight. That always makes things exciting. I pounded down 72oz of water before midnight to complete my water for yesterday and shot for 24oz of water every 90 minutes for the rest of my shift. I made it.

I also made a lot of trips to the bathroom. 

Dinner was slightly delayed by a flurry of activity, and then delayed again with another. So I ate this lukewarm. Oh well. If I'd reheated it the fish would've just turned into jerky. 

I decided to go with legumes.

The night passed fairly quickly. I made a bunch of IVs, did a CE seminar, refreshed my memory on some stuff for the NICU rotation I'm going to help precept in May (yeah, that's right, they're going to let me participate in the education of young pharmacists), and ate snacks.

SNAAAAAACKS!

I made a pot of Deathwish at the start of my shift and had a couple of cups. I switched to tea around 2am. At around 5am I broke out my second snack. I wasn't exactly hungry, but sometimes shit blows up right before 0600 and I didn't want to miss it completely.

Blueberries and coconut yogurt. NOM.

I didn't make it down to the cafeteria for my usual eggs at 0630, so when I got home at 745 I was really hungry and also stupid tired (no nap Thursdays suuuuuuuck). I just ate a little something to quiet my guts and then I was face down in the bed, dead to the world.

Ezekiel toast, I heart you.

I slept reasonably well today. Only woke up once to go to the bathroom, and mercifully fell right back asleep.

I see this image used all the time. It's originally from Hyperbole and a Half

Once I decided I was up for the day, I made breakfast (which is kind of dinner, but not). I still had lots of veg available, so I did it up big.

A little goat cheese in the eggs because I am a fuckin' foodie.

I debated going to the box at 4:15, but my calves were still in knots so I rolled them out and headed to happy hour yoga instead. The first time I ever went to Jenstar was for Hip Hop Happy Hour just about 2 years ago. I hadn't done yoga in a studio really ever, just at the Y, and the instructors always played New Agey "Woo" music and that just isn't my bag. So when my co-worker told me about non-woo music yoga, I agreed to go. That was the start of a long, challenging journey through yoga for me. Now the Friday happy hour schedule is a rotating one, but my favorite instructor had her turn tonight (Hi, Jen!) and she loaded up hip hop for us. It was fucking delightful. One of the things I deeply appreciate about all the instructors at Jenstar is the general lack of Woo. Shit stays low key. The music is typically contemporary (sometimes throwback) but only rarely Woo music. Sometimes there is silence, which can be very calming. I started doing yoga for the workout and the stretch, and it's definitely that. I kept doing it for the stress relief, attention to breath, and sense of balance it provides. I think I have a lot more control over my physical being than I ever did before. I've had nights when I felt energy in the room and left feeling grounded and centered. It's not...transcendent exactly, but it can be emotional (in a good way). As I'm sure you know, I really don't buy into metaphysical claptrap. I do believe that there is something to being fully within yourself and aware of the energy of the people around you. 

At any rate, I did a little dancing in down dog and fell the fuck out of boat pose. It was awesome. Oh, and that standing posture where you hook your fingers around your big toe and push your leg out straight in front of you? I'm totally going to get that shit. It's gonna take forever (thanks, stupid hamstrings), but I'm gonna get it. 

I wore some new pants. Not the ones I got today. Other new pants.

I told you I have a problem. 

When I got home I made myself a yogurt snack. I'm out of the salted caramel flavor, but cocoa nibs are pretty boss mixed into the coconut flavor as it turns out. It ain't exactly chocolate chip ice cream, but I feel waaaaaay less shitty about myself after chowing this down.

Zesty's was open today. This ain't Zesty's

In a minute I'll pack my lunch and hop in the shower. Night 2 of 7 on tap. 

I'll be packing my gym clothes so I can go straight to the box after work in the morning. I don't like to be out of the gym 3 days in a row. It's pretty much my social hour. Then yoga, then a run, then leading a meeting. Once that's all done I'll come home and crash. Since there's no one here but me I can sleep until 8:30 and then just go straight to work. We'll see how that pans out. Luckily my run is only 5 miles at 11+ min/mile so I can full on dog it and still have technically accomplished something. 

Oh gods. The cropped version of my favorite lulu pants just showed up in the clearance section.

They have my size.

Send help.

Day 15 of 23: 800m Repeats Can Suck It

I was all excited for Spring to be here...and it was. In the form of April showers. Sigh. I still wore fucking shorts, because it is APRIL. And wet pants really suck for running.

This morning I got up and headed to the box for the 515. We squatted and rowed and a bunch of other stuff. I was proud of myself for squatting 125 x 5, since that's only 5lbs (10lbs? I can't remember if my max was 130 or 135 suddenly) below my max and I failed the fuck out of 140 a few weeks ago. Stupid lazy glutes. I've gotten lazy with my heavy bridges, since I don't have a flat bench at home and to use the downstairs ottoman I have to shovel a metric ton of shit out of the way. Time to get back on that wagon. Swimsuit season is a-comin'. I wore a new pair of pants today and was again astounded by the fact that through squatting, rowing, snatching, deadlifting, and goblet squatting I never had to pull up my pants! Not once!

I have to eat before I work out. I cannot do it on an empty stomach. So many people can run or whatever with nothing but coffee in their guts, but not me. I can't go hard with no calories. This morning I tried out a Wellabar as a pre-WOD snack. 300ish calories with a nice mix of protein and carbs.

And Deathwish. It's 4:30am for fuck's sake.

After the WOD I did some GHDs and then headed home. Fantastic husband had breakfast and lunch for the kids handled, so I finished my coffee, made another cup, and after the smalls left for school? I made a giant breakfast. If I'm being honest it was a complete bribe. I hate 800m repeats. But if I eat this much I have no excuse not to run fast, right?

EAT ALL THE FOOD.

It was 36ish degrees and raining lightly when we got back to the box. Fantastic husband did the WOD, and I went out for my run. 1.5 miles around the industrial park. Honestly, the temp was fine even in shorts. I wore knee high smartwool socks and I wasn't cold. The wind was kind of evil down Glory Rd, but out of the wind it was fairly pleasant. I did my repeats with a 400m recovery interval. I normally walk at least part of the recovery, but it was too wet for that today. I ran the whole deal, just not as fast at the repeats. Once I finished my 800s, I decided to run a slow mile as a cooldown. During my final mile it started sleeting. By the time I got back to the box I was soaked to the skin. After rolling out my legs (which were bright red from the cold) I changed clothes. Every single layer I was wearing was saturated and my hair was dripping. Spring, my big white ass.

Oh, I also got splashed by a truck. That was fun. 

After his workout, fantastic husband worked on pull-ups and I rolled out my calves (which hurt like a bitch for some reason). Basically we were killing time until HuHot opened at 11, because I was hungry. I had a huge plateful of meat and veg. I love HuHot.

Get in my belly!

After lunch we headed home. I turned on the fireplace and folded laundry while I enjoyed a nice cup of coffee full of booze. Can't be perfect all the time. It was after noon...

Valhalla with Kringle Cream.

One of the things I always found frustrating about training for distance is the hunger. I used to use running for weight loss (which is laughable because it didn't work AT ALL) and the hunger would drive me insane. Now that I eat every 2 hours or so it's less problematic, but the ferocity of it startled me a little today. Must have been the combination of fresh air, cold, and hard intervals.

Snacks. NOM.

Fantastic husband took the smalls to CF kids and then for haircuts, so I was on my own for dinner. I have yoga at 6:30, so I ate early. It's either that or wait until 8 tonight to have my dinner and we all know that's crazy talk. 

Work hard, eat well.

I am very much looking forward to hot yoga tonight. Dreary days make me cold, especially after a strenuous run. I recover too far in the other direction. My heart rate drops through the floor and I get chilled to my bones. Stretching in a hot room will be divine. My legs can definitely use it. 

Tomorrow I'm going to play it by ear. I'm sure I'll go to the box at some point, but I also need a nap before heading back into the salt mine. Something tells me that Friday and Sunday I'm going to do fuck all, so I may need to push myself to be active tomorrow. The weather is supposed to improve pretty markedly. I'm hopeful. 

Goal for this week at work: GET ALL MY WATER. Eat a shitload of veggies. Be as active as possible. 

Try on a pair of extra-small scrub pants. 

Final stretch, then I'm on my own. Strangely, I feel very confident that I can keep this up without oversight. I am going to miss the data, though, because as you know...I love being an experiment of one. 

Day 14 of 23: The Journey of A Thousand Miles...

Begins with falling out of side arm balance. Or some shit.

Just over a week now until my final appointment. It seems hard to believe. I've been at this for almost 12 weeks, which isn't a very long time, but so much has changed. I'm beginning to feel like all the limits I built up in my head are utter bullshit. You know what? I'm not slow. I'm not weak. I'm not fat. And as much as I joke about being old? I've never felt better in my life. I'm staring 40 in the face, and I don't give a shit.

Yesterday was fairly typical. Fantastic husband was working, so I blasted the spawn out of bed at 6:30 and viciously forced them to eat leftover from-scratch pancakes.

"But we just haaaaaaad paaaancaaaakes!"

"Just eat the fucking pancakes, you ungrateful vulture."

"Okay, okay."

Mother of the year right there. For real though, who whines about from scratch pancakes?

My meals were the usual yesterday, nothing fancy. The fanciest thing that happened food-wise was discovering these tasty bitches at Costco. (PS, I think Costco is going to make me start paying rent.)

Decent protein content, nothing artificial. Win.

The box had 3 varieties in it, one that I would count as a full protein serving at 15g (peanut and honey based), this cranberry one at 13g protein, and more of a "snack" bar at 8g protein that is almond based. I would buy them again. I had an almond one as a post-WOD/pre-run snack today and it was plenty caloric, small enough that I wasn't full to the carina, and sat well. Filing that away for future use.

Yesterday I went to CF twice. Once for myself and once for the kids. While there with the kids I worked on snatching. The snatch is easily my weakest lift. It freaks me out. I've been sitting at 75# for my 1 rep for like a year and a half. I worked up the nerve to try 85# last week and failed out of it like 6 times. Yesterday I did the assigned snatch practice and then decided to try and 1 rep from the blocks. Every time I've ever PR'd a snatch it's been from the blocks first, then the floor. I got 85 up. Twice. And failed 90. The fact that I even put 90 on the bar was a major personal victory. 

And then I took the kids to McDonald's (I didn't eat it, silly). Because I am a great mom. Hey, I read to the little bastards before bed. That counts for something, right?

When we got home my next skein of yarn for my Zodiac afghan was in the mailbox. The kids are weirdly fascinated with this blanket as it evolves. They speculate about the next color, they marvel at the fact that I'll be making it for a whole year and that when it's done I'm not going to give it away. I'm a selfish knitter. I almost never give away the products of my labor, so if you own something I made? You should feel pretty damn special. 

"Taurus"

Today I caved to the vultures. They had cereal for breakfast. Whatever. I can only handle so much whining. I made their lunches and when fantastic husband came home he hustled them off to school. I made myself some breakfast.

Oh bacon, I love you.

These Costco berries are phenomenal this time. Last batch was okay, but these are really sweet. I tried a new coffee variety today from the fine people at Deathwish.

I didn't hate it. 

My plan today was the 915 followed by an easy 3 then off to yoga. Which is exactly what I did. The WOD involved running around in circles. 10 circles. 3 times. Running laps indoors on a beautiful sunny day is annoying as fuck. On the up side, I actually did double unders (wearing a fucking overnight pad because I drink 160oz of water a day and holy shit with the involuntary peeing). 

After the workout I changed my shoes, snarfed a Wellabar, and strapped on my Garmin for a slow 3 on the trail that runs near the box. I couldn't locate my wireless headphones, so I went sans tunes. This was actually okay as it was a beautiful nearly windless morning and the stream that runs along the trail was running high and I could hear the water. It was cool enough that it hardly even smelled like chemicals!

I was supposed to shoot for 11:20 min/mile and I came in at 11:05s. Pretty close. 

After my run I came back in to snarf down some more food.

SNAAAAAAACKS!!!!

Then I went to yoga. Where I attempted flying pigeon (my hamstrings were deeply unhappy about this one), side arm balance (I had it. It was fleeting, but I fucking had it), and forearm stand (I caught some air and then freaked out). Side arm balance and forearm stand? You are on notice. I am coming for you. Throw headstand into that. All these poses feel like geometry problems I'm trying to solve. But you know what? I was pretty fucking good at geometry. It may take me a bit, but I'll figure it out. 

Fantastic husband was home from training when I pulled in, so we took the dog for a walk. Just a few miles. When we got home I was ravenous. I had a snack.

IT'S NOT ENOUGH!

And then another one.

OH GODS. STILL NOT ENOUGH.

But by then it was time to start making dinner, so that's what I did. Fortunately for me I had the accidental foresight to save my grain serving, so I had a pile of stroganoff. MMMMM...NOODLES!

So tasty. I can't remember the last time I had noodles.

Later I'll finish my final protein serving with this. I actually enjoy this flavor. I wasn't sure I would, but it's good. Especially with some crunchy cocoa nibs mixed in.

Mmmmm. Protein.

So here's my snapshot of today. Rockin'. I'm into my 4th container of water (not including what I drank during my workouts) and I'll get all 6 today if it kills me. I only got about 100oz yesterday. Fail.

Yeah, veggies!

Fantastic husband is heading out with some of the neighbors and my big plan for this evening is to knit and watch some DVR'd TV. It's a wild life I lead. The kids asked if we could go for a walk and I was all "HAHAHAHAHA fuck that!" So they played outside instead. I'm hoping that the forecasted warm up is going to show up so the yard will dry out. I hate having to send the kids out dressed for winter to combat the water and mud. 

Tomorrow I'm planning the 515, then back to CF at 915 to run intervals while fantastic husband does the WOD. Running back and forth in an industrial park for 5x800 @ 4:05 may sound sucktastic, but it beats the shit out of the treadmill. Plus the intervals are marked, so all I really have to do is run back and forth between them. It's supposed to be relatively nice tomorrow, which means shorts and a tank top! WHEEEEEE!!! I'll finish the night at yoga, which I'm sure I'll desperately need by then. 

I don't want to go back to work on Thursday. Adulting is lame. But I need to work to support my pants habit...they've been arriving bit by bit. I'm still wrapping my head around wearing a lulu size 6. It wasn't so long ago that I couldn't wear their clothes at all...size 12 is the top of their line and they only make a few styles in that size. Every time I look at a pair I think "There's no way I'm going to fit in that." But I do. I fucking do. 

I'm so glad I took that step through the door at Nutritional Healing  three months ago. It completely changed my outlook. Onward and upward, bitches. There are goals out there that need crushing. 

Day 12 of 23: I Hate Running and Other Stories

Ok, so I don't hate running. Well, maybe I do a little bit. It's just that running has become such a goddamn chore lately. It's not running's fault. It's this weather. This is the time of year when I'm not supposed to have to plan every piece of gear. I'm supposed to be able to toss on a tank top and a pair of shorts and just go, but instead I'm dealing with 3 layers to combat the cold or the wind or the rain or the snow or what-the-fuck-ever. Winter training is my jam...but not in the fucking spring. I miss wanting to run. Lately it's been just pounding out the miles because I have to. Yes, I realize no one is holding a proverbial gun to my head, but I paid for this training program and I paid for the two upcoming half marathons on my calendar. It's entirely possible that once the Cellcom is in the bag I won't run for quite some time. Or if I do, it will be a quick 6 with a friend followed by beer, the way the gods intended.

Goal this week is head down and grind.

Saturday I tried on my new small pants and went to yoga. I had a scary moment when I pulled them on as the seam around the calf creaked and stretched. I thought for sure the damn thing had split. Thankfully, it didn't and I made it through a whole class without having to hike up my pants! Hooray!

My favorite, favorite pants!

Saturday was also my first time at Bonsai for sushi. It was good. That place is weird, though. I'd been there once or twice when it was whatever it used to be, and there's something slightly disconcerting about being in a basement restaurant. 

I hitched a ride with some friends to Appleton to watch our mutual friend Scully Crossbones in a derby bout. Roller derby is an interesting sport. No one has ever explained the rules to me, so having Scully give me a short tutorial was really helpful. The home team annihilated the visitors from Chicago, which actually made following what was happening much easier. Mostly I admired some of the hits I saw go down. Hitting on roller skates? That is badass as fuck. 

Holy shit I miss hitting. There is something so deeply satisfying about tossing some bitch on her head. Derby intrigues me. I haven't done much skating in years and years, and I wasn't good at it when I did it. So while I kind of want to try it, the "on wheels" of it all is intimidating. Also I feel as though picking up another potentially damaging hobby is courting disaster. 

But...I do already have a mouthguard. 

This morning I woke up late (seriously, 8:45-WTF?) and came downstairs to an eerily quite house. I gathered by the flotsam around that fantastic husband had gone for a run and the smalls were downstairs in the basement. So I made myself some grey-day comfort food.

Oats, berries, nuts, and seeds.

I should've run 10 miles this weekend, and I didn't. I just didn't want to. The cold and shitty wintery bullshit of it all stole my desire. I've already done a 10, so I know I can. This week I'll get those runs, especially the tempo and interval runs. 

Fantastic husband decided against the Team WOD today since he'd already done 8 miles and his knee was feeling tricky. I went, and participated in a baseball themed workout that was actually a lot of fun. We did a lot of sprinting, so I guess in a way I got a run in. Before heading to the box I mashed a pepper and some hummus into my face along with some string cheese. You'll have to take my word for it.

After the WOD I chowed down a BBE (CRUTCH!) because I'd missed the window for lunch. I did have a nice bowl of berries and yogurt for a snack. Use your imagination.

Since I went to the derby bout on Saturday night, I missed the premier of Outlander. Fortunately, I DVR that shit. Not so that I can watch it over and over again. No...not at all. I mean why would a person do that? I can't think of a single reason...

OH HAI, SAM HEUGHAN! TALK SCOTTISH TO ME!

Lemme just say that it's clear Sam Heughan squats. Unnnnf. Oh yeah, and strong female lead character and shit. But mostly Sam speaking French with a Scottish accent. Drools and dies. 

Sunday night is yoga for me. My left hip was kind of cranky going in, but felt much better afterwards. Tonight's class was heavily attended. Normally there's a handful of us and it's easy to get my favorite spot (back left corner against the mirror, bitches) but tonight it was a bit of a squeeze. 

Dinner was some salmon and veg and rice I'd put aside from the other night. I was too lazy to plate it.

Still pretty tasty.

We washed the spawn tonight, and after getting into his jammies, C decided to flex for us. We complimented his gainz and I flexed my arm for him. He squeezed my bicep and pronounced "Muscles aren't supposed to be squishy, Mom." Thanks, asshole. That boy is lucky he's so cute. 

I tried to talk P into cutting his mullet. Fantastic husband swooped in to tell the boy that he didn't have to listen to me, that his hair was his decision. I had him considering cutting it, too. Thanks, asshole. That guy is lucky he's so cute.

Tomorrow it's back to the box for 915, then some extra work at open gym. I made some time for a little self-maintenance mid-day, then back across town with the kids for CF kids in the afternoon. Not sure what I'll work on tomorrow afternoon. Maybe I'll try to 1 rep a deadlift. Maybe I'll work on snatching. It's a smorgasbord of possibility in that place. 

I'm over the midpoint of my 8 day off stretch, which is sad, but still lots of time left. 11 days until my final visit with Kirk the Nutrition Guy. My initial goals are so close. I want to crush them, and then move on to new goals. 

Relentless. Forward. Progress. 

Day 10 of 23: CFGB is My Living Room

Today was biz-zay. I left the house at 7:15am and didn't return until almost 6pm. Getting the kids out the door earlier than usual can be a serious chore, but they did reasonably well this morning. Except for P's left shoe debacle.

It's always a little bizarre when you realize your kids are adopting your mannerisms. I'll freely admit that I'm kind of a shouty mom, and I curse a lot. My daughter has pulled out some curse words here and there (never in public, praise cheeses) but my sons typically do not. This morning P was very frustrated by the fact that he couldn't locate his left shoe. He stood in the entryway in front of the open closet and shouted "I can't find my shoe!" so I responded "Well, if you put it in there it must still be in there. I didn't move it, and I'm pretty sure there's no such thing as shoe fairies."

His response? "Maybe I could find my shoe if L and C didn't leave their shit all over the closet floor!"

I may be guilty of repeatedly uttering the instruction "Put your things away in the front closet-and hang it up, don't just leave your shit all over the closet floor!"

At any rate, we located the shoe and made it out the door in time for me to drop the daycare schedule, ask the daycare teachers if the kids could walk to school with them (I feel bad dropping them off too early, they are still pretty small), and busting ass to the West Side for some lab work. As my program with Nutritional Healing draws to a close, I get all my initial lab work redone to see if anything has changed or improved over the course of 12 weeks of stellar eating. The phlebotomist drew like 10 tubes of blood. It was lightening fast.

Since I was already on the west side, it didn't make sense for me to drive home only to turn around and drive back for CF at 915, so I just went over there. I had packed myself a lunchbox full of stuff since I knew I wouldn't be going home. So I heated up my breakfast and talked about politics with Justin and two other members while I ate. They say you shouldn't talk about politics or religion, but if the people are reasonable I don't see the problem. I think most of us are closer to agreement on many issues than we realize.

This is leftover sweet potato hash from last night, but instead of sausage I added two runny eggs and a cup of mushrooms. Delicious.

Fanciest breakfast this table's ever seen.

Then I walked around with my coffee and avoided doing anything useful for a while. Eventually I foam rolled my legs and back. Today's workout was fun. Rope climbs (which I used to hate but now kind of dig), running (outside in the snow, which was actually okay), hand-stand push-ups (yay), and one heavy-ass deadlift for a 14 minute AMRAP. I got 6 rounds and only kind of rope burned my shins. I loaded my bar with 195#, which was my previous one rep max for deadlift. I'm gonna say it's not anymore.

The 45# plates make me feel like a badass.

Kind of a wussy badass, but whatevs.

After the workout I did some squatting, then had some time to kill before yoga so I watched a friend practice a competition workout and stuffed my face full of peppers and hummus and cheese.

Eating is my life. 

I didn't leave until almost 1130. So I spent the entire morning randomly wandering around the gym. It's not like I didn't work out, but I ate twice and only worked out once...so there's that. I used the microwave and the coffeemaker and the table, it was almost like being at home, except colder.

After leaving CFGB I picked up a couple of magazines to read while I waited for my car to be serviced later on. I was hoping for a copy of The Atlantic, but they seemed to be out. I've never read Reason before, but it was interesting. Clearly a libertarian-leaning publication, but I enjoyed reading it.

PS, Newsweek is super lame.

I went to hot yoga at noon. Lots of hamstringy stuff and twists an back work. All much needed. An exciting development today! WHEEEEEEELLLLLL!!!!! I made it up into wheel! Jen gave me a strap to wrap around my biceps so my elbows wouldn't flare out and BAM! WHEEL! That strap was fucking magic. I was so excited. There may have been squealing. I have a tendency to squeal when excited. It's not very dignified, but all progress is to be celebrated-right? Relentless forward progress, bitches.

Next up was car service. I had a BBE packed, and I picked up a Starbucks on the way to the highway.

CRUTCH.

Got my car all up to date and shiny. I had initially intended to run during the hour or so I had to wait, but it was near white-out conditions and it felt like a bad idea to run around an unfamiliar area in a blizzard, so I didn't.

Then I headed home up stupid fucking 41. GODS I hate 41. I once passed up a fairly lucrative job offer because it meant I'd have to commute on 41 every day and I can't even with that stupid road. It was snowing, and apparently a semi jack-knifed at the county line. It took an hour and a half to go 20ish miles. 

WHAT IS THIS WATER FROM THE SKY?

By the time I picked up the dog and the kids and made it home, it was damn near 6pm and I was spent. My road rage burns hot. It's kind of exhausting. 

When I got home there was a package in the mailbox. The replacement for my favorite pants. It's moment of truth time, people. Size. Small. I did wear my new lulu pants and tank today. It's pretty cool when your clothes fit, I have to say. 

I'll try these on later, after I shower.

I fired up the oven and made fish sticks for the smalls to go with broccoli and blueberries. I threw a piece of salmon on the pan for me. Today's grain serving came in the form of brown rice. This was tasty and filling, if a little basic. 

So well balanced.

The endless stories of small children are much more interesting when told through a glass of wine.

How's your wine, Mommy?

After dinner the kids asked for dessert (as per usual). They ate well with no complaints (hallelujah), so I told them they could have something from their Easter baskets. C decided he wanted some chocolate rabbit. 

"Mom, can I have some chocolate rabbit?"

"Sure, bring it here."

"I want it's head."

Just the head.

I haven't had alcohol in a while. I'm feeling a little silly on half a glass of wine. heeheeheeeeeeee

Still have a few boxes to check, so I'll be mashing this into my pie-hole in a little while.

The cocoa nibs make it fancy. 

I honestly don't remember what I'm doing tomorrow. Running? CF? Yoga? I'll figure it out eventually. I do get to see roller derby for the first time in ages, though. That's pretty cool. 

This snow and stupid cold need to go. My shorts want to come out to play...and as previously mentioned I'm pretty short on pants.

Wow. I need to shower. I'm so disgusting I'm starting to itch.