Wednesday, March 7, 2012

Fourteen Point One is not Fifteen

A recap of my run today:

Leaving the house:
What a great day, I feel all bouncy and happy and runner-y

Mile 1:
Oh, well...it's a wee bit windy! That's okay, it's such a nice day!

Mile 2:
Wow, it's really windy! Look at the tops of all those big trees...they sure are blowing around. Good thing I'm going downhill! Lalalalalala

Mile 3-6:
Why have I never run this route before? It's so pretty! Also nice and flat with a clearly marked bike lane! Lalalalalala

Mile 7-9:
Uphill is so much nicer with a tailwind. This hill isn't so bad at all! Hmmm...those trees are a little worrying...still blowing around quite a bit.

Mile 10:
AAAAAAAAAAARRRRRGHHHHHH!!!!! OH GOD THE WIND MAKE IT STOP MAKEITSTOPMAKEITSTOP. OW!!! OWOHMYGOD OH.MY.GOD. WHERE IS THE TURN?!?! WHERE IS IT?!? I'M BLIND! I CAN'T SEE ANYMORE! AAAAAAHHHHHHHH!!!!

Mile 11:
Ok. Crosswind still sucks, but better than headwind. I can do this. After the next turn it is downhill all the way. Just keep swimming just keep swimming just keep swimming....

Mile 12:
OHMYGODNOOOOOOOO!!!!!! I WANT MY MOMMY!!! I HATE MY LIFE!!!! WHY, UNIVERSE, WHY?!?!!? WHAT HAVE I DONE TO OFFEND YOU SO?!?!? I'M A NICE PERSON!!! I PAY MY TAXES AND TRY REALLY HARD NOT TO KICK KITTENS!!! WHYYYYY?

Mile 13:
It's okay (gasp). It's okay (wheeze). Just 2 little miles. 2 miles. It's nothing. There's a downhill! See! Oh, ow, downhill is not my frieeeeeeeeeeend. Hey, 2:26 isn't so bad for 13.1. I can do this. It'll be okay. Just 1.6 little miles. It's a tailwind now! See?

Mile 14:
OHMYGODIT'SNOTATAILWIND. i'm going to cry. DON'T CRY SISSY PANTS, JUST POWER THROUGHITPOWERTHROUGHIT JUST DO THIS YOU PANSY-ASS MOTHERSMURFER!!

Mile 14.1:
Fuck this. I gotta pee.

And there you have it. I finished the 14.1 in 2:38. At the 10 mile mark I was on pace to do 15 in 2:40. The demon wind killed it. I'm certain I looked like some kind of crazed mime to anyone driving by. Mile 10 took 13:58. That is madness.

Part of me thinks I should have just finished the 15, even if I had to walk it. The other part of me was in so much pain from hunching into a driving headwind that I wanted to lay down in the road. My head hurts from squinting into the sandstorm that is a driving headwind after a huge snowfall melts.

Regardless, I ran farther today than I have ever run before. I'm starting to think I can do this marathon thing, because I really did feel great until the wind smacked me down at mile 10.

And now? I'm going to have pie.

3 comments:

  1. Hey, that is pretty damn close to 15 and you should be super pumped because you felt good for most of it AND you ran it all in the crazy wind. You recap did make me laugh super hard though - I love the up and down thoughts during a long run.

    Aren't you so happy I made plans in Madison so that you had to switch you run to today, the windiest day of the year? You're welcome!

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  2. 14.1 is pretty fucking close to 15. Can't wait to run with you on Saturday you badass 15 miler you.

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  3. i regularly want to lay down in the road, whether or not i'm running. i think you are awesome for totally killing 14.1!

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